A cold but slightly warm weekend in the winter of 2024,
Is this feeling because it’s the weekend, or because it was so cold yesterday?
Or is it because today is a day full of excitement?
On my way to experience yoga for the first time at the invitation of a good person,
It is not an easy road, taking more than 40 minutes by car until 9 a.m. on Sunday,
Seeing as it felt strangely short, the weather may actually have been cold.
With warm, saturated lighting that warmly embraces me as both excitement and worry coexist.
The instructor full of smiles welcomed me.
Contrary to what was expected from her smile, the postures were not easy,
Yoga poses that twist and straighten your body
He corrected my tilted balance.
The last time lying on the floor and listening to the singing bowl
The last remaining tension resonated and spread far away.
Without even realizing it, my mind disappeared along with the tension.
I fell into a light but happy sleep.
In the sweet sleep led by the singing bowl, I saw myself running.
For this restful time today
Like a feeling of heterogeneity that rushed at war-like speed
When I was in middle school, I was stressed about Chinese characters and Japanese.
When I was in high school, I was struggling with my major.
When I was a college student, I was afraid of academic probation.
When I was new in society, I was frustrated with a job I didn’t want.
It seemed.
Why did you do that? Why was the moment when I was most relaxed and rested,
Did you remember my most difficult moments?
And now, today I was still running for what,
What kind of day were you walking for?
Another wave passed by
Me as an elementary school student, me as a middle school student,
My college student self covers my work self
I saw it now.
Me and my family sitting next to us, who were smiling right now,
And I saw her smiling at me.
In the past, there was someone who helped me up when I almost collapsed.
I was still looking outside, tying my shoelaces to run out.
With the teacher’s soft but clear voice announcing the end of time
I put down my shoelaces and sat down.
I sat down and looked at her.
No, I didn’t hesitate.
I looked into whether I could just enjoy the present and be happy in reality.
I wanted to find everything I wanted to do most right now.
I wanted this ‘time’ to be more precious than money, fame, or success.
It’s good to have to do it, but
Do what you want to do
I wanted to save myself.
I just wanted to make sure that the people I was with never lost their smiles.
Many people comment on yoga like this:
‘Exercise to find peace of mind in difficult postures’
What was my sweet but bitter short dream?
Perhaps it was ‘a movement that helped me find stability in the present amidst a difficult past.’
Me who was just trying to rest
I lay down to realize.
A clear mind comes only from a difficult posture.
A happy reality may come only when we let go of the past of pain and the future of worry.
I was most interested in what I would look like in 5 years.
I heard myself say the word ‘It’s okay’ 5 years later.
I was glad I could hear it.
2024-12-13 00:42:00